Hanging By a Thread

5 Things You Should Know: Almost Everything I Needed to Know About Parenting I Learned in College {Around 2 AM After the Bars Closed}

The things you learn outside the classroom can be just as important in life. For instance, there isn't much about an English Lit or Poli Sci class that prepares you for the trenches of Parenthood, but my college years did teach me about making it through those difficult parenting moments:

1. Up All Night. Pulling all-nighters partying or studying, then brushing your teeth, splashing water on your face, downing a coca-cola and going on to class, despite the grogginess and sleep in your eyes and still acing the test; this skill translates well to the early days of infancy of sleep, feed, change a diaper, sleep, feed, change a diaper and then get up and get to work;
2. Toilet Training. During the college years, you're sure to encounter a very drunk friend or stranger turned new friend who needs your help finding the toilet and remaining upright while using the toilet; this skill translates well when you have toddlers new to the toileting system or half-asleep kids who need an extra helping hand.
3. Cleaning Up Puke. Once again, during those partying years, someone dear to you, whether it be you yourself, a friend, roommate or boyfriend, is going to drink too much and puke somewhere that needs to be wiped up right away; this skill translates well when you've got a sick kid puking on you, in the car or in the middle of a store.
4. Crying It Out. Remember when your friend broke up with a boyfriend or worse got dumped and stayed up all night crying and talking it out, and you, the good friend, stayed up too? Yeah, well, this skill definitely translates well through several different baby and toddler stages, and illnesses; related to #1; see above.
5. Feeding the Mind and Body. You can survive on Junk Food (at least for a while). I went through my entire 1^st year of college consuming not much more than French fries and cokes from McDonalds and bean burritos with sour cream (90 cents!) from Taco Bell. And I did quite well academically. Seriously! So, when your picky kid won't touch anything but goldfish and frozen waffles, remember that he'll live and eventually will outgrow this stage.

And then in Law School I learned how to bring a witness {AKA stubborn child not telling the truth} to his apologetic knees.....it works on husbands too. Over and out....

Anna

Love: This Little Light of Mine, I’m Gonna Let it Shine

LOVE

True LOVE

Real LOVE

Deep as an Ocean

All encompassing

Love does not conform; Love won't be stopped by laws

LOVE does not Discriminate; LOVE understands; LOVE Forgives

LOVE Survives

Love Heals

Love Saves

God is

LOVE

As we near this year's very heated, passionate election day, please take a moment to remember to Love your neighbors, your friends, your family regardless of what they believe or advocate for or who they vote for or whose signs are firmly planted in their yards.

Love is the most important thing we have. Live by example; let your love be a roaring fire that shines out for the world to see; don't hide it under a bushel. Love is not shameful. Over and out...

Anna

The ABCs of Anna’s 38th Birthday

This started out as something that Darling 2 and I were working on when he came up with it one afternoon, and then I decided to type it out. We got part way through the alphabet and then got distracted and went on to something else. When I came back to it, I started thinking of my own birthday {Oct. 14^th}, and this is what I came up with:

A is for an Awesome Day to be Celebrated

B is for Balloons and Breakfast in Bed

C is for Cake and any other Confections that Come My Way

D is for Decking the Halls with Decorations; handmade by my Darling Boys

E is for Eternal Youth {I can hope for it, at least}

F is for Facebook Birthday Wishes

G is for Gifts

H is for "Happy Birthday!"

I is for Ice Cream

J is for Just Between Friends Conversations Over Coffee

K for Some Kid-Free Time

L is for Lattes

M is for Birthday Shoppin' Money

N is for Natural, Ageless Inner Beauty {I aspire to have this, at the very least}

O is for Getting Older and Enjoying It

P is for Pastries at Patisserie {46, that is}

Q is for Quiet Moments Alone

R is for Dinners Out at Restaurants and Red Roses

S is for Sweet Surprises

T is for Treasured Memories of Birthdays Past

U is for getting Carded; Just in Case You're Underage {Yeah right, but it happens}

V is for Vino; a Glass or Two

W is for Blowing Out Candles and Making Wishes

X is for eXtra Special Treatment

Z is for getting lots of Beauty Sleep ZZZs So Age Doesn't Matter!

What do your ABCs stand for? Over and out...

Anna

Collage: Creating Something New from Something Broken {A Lesson in Persistence and Love}

England Summer of 1996

Back in 1996, I spent a magical, amazing summer in London. I toured a number of cathedrals and castles and towers in London and the surrounding countryside while there. All were impressive and beautiful; some left more of an impression than others. One story that has stayed with me all these years came from the tour of Winchester Cathedral; one of the oldest and longest cathedrals in England.

In 1642, Cromwell's troops smashed the huge stained glass windows in this cathedral. The women of Winchester gathered all the pieces of the shattered glass and tried to put the pictures back together, but they couldn't. So, instead they simply used all the pieces to make a collage of sorts.

The pieces are there, but they're just in a different order; creating a completely new work of art. It was one of the most beautiful stained glass windows I've ever seen.

This story really touched me; the care and love that went into that window must have been great.

Texas Summer of 2011

In the summer of 2011, I wrote about the end of the marriage between my sister-in-law and brother-in-law and my anger and grief over losing my sister-in-law in the process. It was a gut-wrenching, broken-hearted, confusing time for our family.

My sister-in-law and brother-in-law kept saying they were praying for a miracle.

Half of me thought with a smirk what kind of miracle? The divorce petition had been filed and served; my brother-in-law had moved out; hearts had been torn in two. The other half of me thought why can't this story end like a country love song {my favorite kind of country song} and they vow to love each other and make it work.

But mostly, I thought it was over and we would all learn the new rules of family gatherings, holidays and loss from divorce.

Texas Summer of 2012

Well, I was wrong. They got their miracle. A year after thinking it was over for good a crazy, miraculous thing happened. They fell in love; a love like they had never had. This love is deep and wide and puts goofy smiles on their faces.

Persistence and New Designs

Sometimes something can be so broken; so crushed down and ripped into little pieces that it becomes unrecognizable. Often those pieces are swept up and thrown into the garbage. But sometimes those pieces are carefully gathered and preserved until they can be put back together again. And like the Winchester Cathedral, you can't always get those pieces to look like it did before. No, instead, it becomes something completely new and more beautiful than before.

And that's what happened here. There was a marriage before, but it never looked like this. Now, it's a beautiful work of art that was hand-wrought from hard lessons learned, a new common aim and a deep and abiding love for each other and their family that was ignored and forgotten in the past, but came shining through when the shards were pieced together in this new design.

The Scoop

So, when something is broken and appears to be beyond repair, remember the Winchester Cathedral stained glass window that was pieced into an amazing new design in 1660; 18 years after it was shattered during a civil war. All it takes is a fresh perspective and an enduring persistence; and maybe a country love song or two.

I can't deny that this pleases me beyond words, brings a tear to my eye and puts a goofy smile on my face. Miracles happen every day.

Ironically, it was the summer of 1996 that this marriage began; just 1 month before I traveled to England and toured the Winchester Cathedral. Over and out....

Anna

5 Things {Someone} Should Know {What I Want for My Birthday}

It's the simple things in life that make us smile, right? Well, these items on my birthday list are pretty simple, and it's what would make me happy this week. My Boys can be selfish and self-centered at times, but when it comes to my Birthday, Christmas and Mother's Day, they do a pretty darn good job of making me feel special. So, I bet I can count on them for at least a few of these things:

 

1. A very sensible, much-needed, well-used MomAgenda Family Planner Notepad {that I just ran out of};
2. A box of some good black tea {I'm out of that too};
3. A pedicure in a decidedly Not hoity toity salon {I know it's getting to be boot weather, but I never got one this summer, and my feet could REALLY use some pampering} Of course, I could just spend my money on several pairs of fantastic boots I just spied at Target instead. Hmmmm;
4. A coffee date with a friend to just sit and chat and sip on coffee without any time-checking or rushing off to other things; and
5. Something really chocolatey and really decadent and amazingly fantastic for me to indulgently devour {a package of Rustica's Bittersweet Chocolate Cookies could suffice}.

Because I'm really a {very complicated} simple kind of gal...What are 5 things on your birthday list? Over and out...

Anna

Glitterama: Why I Hate My Kids’ Birthday Parties

I hate throwing my kids' birthday parties. It's not the planning or the prep work. I actually enjoy all of that. And I love my kids despite their oblivion to all the work we've put into the simple, understated birthday affair and are intent on wrecking the setup, dipping into the food and creating new messes in the one or two hours before the event begins. But the chaos, the mess, the destruction, the mess, the craziness, the mess is what makes me regret the simple party-at-home idea.

In theory, it always sounds nice. In theory, it's manageable and organized. In theory, I must be crazy. I never learn my lesson either; for a few years I remember and I hold the party "off-campus." Then, I forget and I start to theorize again; and that's when I get into trouble.

Darling 2 couldn't decide on a theme for his 4^th birthday party. He batted around ideas for Ninja Turtles, super heroes, Angry Birds and more. So, I had a big, bright idea; a big, bright, dumb idea. How about we have a costume party and decorate masks? We could have a mish-mash party in celebration of all masked/costumed characters, with a Ninja Turtles cake made by me and super hero plates and napkins, etc.; he loved the idea.

In theory, this sounded good. We plotted and planned together. We raided my basement closet with art supplies, holiday décor and past party provisions. We hit the Dollar Store, Target's Dollar area and Michael's. I had stickers, paper, scissors, glue sticks, tape, popsicle sticks, feathers, flowers, ribbons, glitter glue, rhinestones, markers, crayons, fancy pipe cleaners, pom poms and glitter; yes, glitter.

I was proud of my creative organization and my artful designs. And for a few moments, I must have forgotten that I have two boys and all the reasons that I hate doing art in my home; all the reasons that I paid for art classes when Darling 1 was little.

Now, to be fair with myself, I had originally planned to throw this shindig outside. But Mother Nature had other ideas, and this weekend we had our first freeze, making it a little too chilly for a backyard bash.

So, as I stood back and calmly watched glue and glitter and toys and cake and wrapping paper and packaging litter the floor and cover the tables and spill onto the chairs and creep across the room, it all came back to me.

Like a light bulb above the head of a character in a comic strip; ah yes, these are the reasons I don't have parties at home... especially artful parties at home...involving glitter.

I do this to myself. I almost always make the invitations and cake; and each year their expectations, designs and demands get higher; and if held elsewhere, I cart along cake, supplies, decorations, etc. to the location of the parties, often a park for the July birthday of Darling 1, where there are no amenities provided; and I try to be creative with the food, activities and take homes treats; all making me exhausted and crabby by party time.

Now, it's important to note that the children involved in the merry-making did indeed enjoy themselves during the costume wearing, mask making, toy playing, piñata smashing and cake eating events. And the birthday boy had a wonderful time with his dear friends.

And that puts a smile on my face, even as a wiped cake from the chair cushion and swept up glitter from the floor, sorted toys and re-organized all the art supplies...downstairs...high above the reach of little boys, but still within reach of creative concoctions.

I wonder how long it will be before I forget again why I shouldn't have birthday parties at home. Over and out....

Anna

5 Things You Should Know {About Life and Kittens}

Last November, we lost our dear, sweet, giant St. Bernard, Ben. In June, we lost our 17 year old black cat, Jazz, who was my guy. While we still mourn the deaths of these incredible pets, I decided we needed another little black kitten in our home again {and eventually we'll get another loving puppy}.

We quickly found a few on petfinder.com, but when I saw this guy I knew it was right. After having cats for almost 38 years, I can look into those shiny green or amber eyes and know...something I had a hard time convincing my husband of, but it's true.

Years ago, while in college, Will and I started with cats, graduated to dogs and eventually added the boys. So, our children have always been surrounded by older, many of them nurturing, pets. It was with great excitement that we added a tiny Jazzy cat look-alike late this summer.

It took the boys a bit to adjust to this teeny, playful, cuddly kitten, and Darling 2 was even a tad jealous of the new baby in the house. All is well now, and we all love our kitten, Teddy.

Our household needed some new energy; some joy; and we got it when we added this kitten. Here are 5 things you should know about kittens;

1. There is nothing more joyous, more enthusiastic, more curious than a little kitten when playing, exploring; figuring things out;
2. Kittens don't know they are tiny; they think that when they puff and arch and march sideways they are intimidating and tough and the size of at least a small lion;
3. Kittens don't give up; even when rejected by older, grumpier cats, or when their plots and plans are foiled to attack something or open something or reach something, they just keep coming back and trying again;
4. Kittens really know how to enjoy a nap; and
5. Kittens freely give and receive love and attention.

We could all learn something from watching kittens. Life is actually pretty simple; we just tend to complicate matters and get tangled up in our messes. Over and out...

Anna

My Life...So Far {38 Lessons}

Life is a constant lesson. Just when you think you've got a hold on it and you've learned everything the world can teach you, a new saga begins. But without these adventures, trials, heartbreaks and triumphs life would be dull and lifeless; at least that's what I keep telling myself.

I have lived almost 38 years on this earth, and I've been thinking about the lessons I've learned over the years. And here they are; 39 of them:

1. Stepping out of your comfort zone is always worth it;
2. Quietly taking in your surroundings and evaluating the situation can be very helpful in future dealings;
3. Always take each opportunity that comes your way; it may not present itself ever again;
4. Surround yourself with pets; you will always feel loved and understood, even when the world doesn't get you;
5. Be true to yourself; this can be hard when your heart falls hard and leads the way {in the wrong direction};
6. Fall in love, even if it might mean getting hurt; it's worth it;
7. Stand up for what you believe is right;
8. Never compromise when it means giving up on a dream;
9. Even if dreams have to be shelved for a while, don't let them stay on the shelf so long that they become unrecognizable;
10. Never give up...not ever; not even on the darkest nights; the morning will come;
11. When one road is closed, start searching for alternate routes....there's always at least one;
12. Be your own cheerleader;
13. You can always come home...or call home; my parents are my rock, my life support, my ultimate fans;
14. My relationship with my brother is one of the most important ones in my life;
15. My sorority sisters are my sisters and true friends; I love them and when I'm with them we are still 20 and the years and miles between us are erased;
16. My husband does more for me, our family and our home than most husbands do, and I should show more appreciation than I do;
17. Brand new love is the most exciting, but old love is the most reassuring;
18. Love at first sight...or first dance...or first conversation happens;
19. Say what you mean and mean what you say;
20. Sometimes it's best to bite your tongue and leave a few things unsaid {a tough lesson for me};
21. Life can be disappointing, but whether it continues to be disappointing is up to you;
22. Loss hurts...acknowledge it....feel it...grieve and then get back to living life;
23. Take a chance...again....and again...and again;
24. Move...live in different cities... states...countries, if you can;
25. Being a mom has filled my life, but being a mom is not my whole life;
26. Be present; soak up the here and now because the days, months and years fly by;
27. Kids complicate things, bring out the best and worst, but the joy they add and lessons they teach are worth it;
28. Waiting to have kids was one of the best things we did for our marriage;
29. Never miss the chance to tell your child you love him;
30. Advocate for your children; you know them better than anyone else;
31. Always say you're sorry when you've made a mistake or said something that was hurtful;
32. Swallow your pride; you won't choke on it, but you'll end up playing the part of the pompous fool if you don't;
33. Dance anytime you have a chance....who cares what you look like {this took me a long time to realize};
34. Pray without ceasing;
35. Believe in miracles;
36. Speak from your heart; everyone has something important to say; don't be afraid to tell your story;
37. Sleep when you can;
38. Read only books you love; books that speak to you; otherwise, you're wasting your time; and one to grow on....
39. You don't have to live every minute of every day because that's exhausting, but do your best to live while you can.

I think I pretty much covered the big ones, but there are more, of course. And I the older I get the more transparent the life lessons become. What has life taught you? Over and out...

Anna