Hanging By a Thread

Nothing. Nada. Zip. {When the Words Don’t Flow}

Sometimes I feel a heaviness in my heart or buzzing in my head or nervous, confused energy. I feel that tonight. There are lots of words and feelings and thoughts bumping around inside. I sit down to write because I know there must be something that needs to come out through my fingertips. I began a sentence and then delete the words. I start another sentence, but that's not right either. I delete again.

Nothing sounds right. Nothing is flowing. There are bits of this and pieces of that; random thoughts that don't go anywhere. I scan the headlines on news sites. I pick up an old paper I've been saving because something had caught my eye for a potential article. I flip through a few magazines and look through a list of story ideas. Nothing.

There is no spark. I'm tired, but I have an energy pulsing through me. There is something I should be writing, but what is it.

I want to tell about how my amazingly creative my kids are and how I can't wait to see what they do with those inventive juices and how I want to be sure that no one and nothing ever crushes that energy and ingenuity because with it they can go far and do interesting, perhaps important things.

I want to discuss why the top job that women hold is still secretary...the same as it was in 1950. Is this OK; not OK; is it surprising; is it the glass ceiling or family duties or by choice or lack of ambition or confidence or something entirely different? I don't know what all it means, but it is interesting.

I want to talk about our flag and why this fabric sewn with stripes and stars is so sacred to some, but not to others. Do we feel the same about our national icons that our parents or grandparents do/did? And should they be protected by law?

I want to write about the fine line the Academy Awards walk between being a ridiculously stupid, self-absorbed, spoiled rich kid and an inspiring, emotional, uplifting, creative, brilliantly gifted kid. And I want to tell you that I didn't know who Seth McFarlane was until I looked him up on Google. And I think the Oscars better keep looking for a host.

But none of those topics are coming together tonight. So, I will sleep with this heaviness, the buzzing and the energy pulses and at the right moment the words will string together properly. Over and out...

Anna

Motherly Advice {Stand Up}

Never for the sake of peace and quiet deny your convictions.

~Dag Hammarskjold, Swedish Diplomat, Economist and Author, Nobel Peace Prize Winner

Are you guilty of this? I think we all are at some time or another.

The subject of the conviction could be a religious belief, a political stance, a societal or cultural or personal issue. It could be a conviction shared by many or only you.

The point is that it's important to stand up for what you believe and for what is right, whether it's a popular stance or not. The point is not to make a lot of noise and pick a fight for the sake of attention.

This may be a fine line in some cases.

I have found that for me personally, when it's a deep conviction, standing up to bully, detractor or source of authority is a knee jerk reaction, not something I have think about.

That is not to say that I have never made a lot of noise just to make a point. I have.

I make many mistakes as a parent, but one thing I have always been purposeful about with my kids is telling them what I stand up for and why. And they understand this and expect me to be strong and tough when the situation calls for it. They should never fear voicing their convictions or defending the rights of others who are mistreated or standing tall in the face of injustice or wrongdoing.

Do you take responsibility for upholding your convictions through words and actions or quietly stand in the corner biting your tongue because you don't want to cause a scene or you fear looking like a fool or think it's not your place to say something?

My philosophy....always speak what's on your heart and you can't go wrong. Your heart won't betray you over fear; your head might, but not your heart. Over and out...

Anna

Related articles

Motherly Advice {Living Fearlessly}

Motherly Advice {On Aging}

Sharing is Right, Except When it’s Lies.... {Ferreting Out the “Rats”}

Being Lead Astray

If you see it on Facebook it must be true, right? I mean no one would spread false or misleading or misattributed information on the Internet, and certainly not on Facebook. Those people are my friends, right?

Don't bet on it. Uh, I mean the truth part, not the friend part.

I've noticed a disturbing trend on Facebook of information being recklessly passed from friend to friend at lightning speed without regard to truth or accuracy. If it hits a nerve, is witty or cute or grabs your attention, it gets shared on Facebook. If it has a political implication or is satirical or jaw-dropping, you can bet this information being shared.

Perhaps I'm more skeptical or question more than the average Joe, but I tend to read the quotes and information, and then check it for sources online.

Generally, if it smells like rat and looks like a rat, by Jove, it's a rat. And I have yet to find one that isn't incorrect or misattributed that gave off such an odor.

Here's an example of what I'm talking about:

Say What?

Picture a distinguished painting of George Washington, our 1^st President and across the image this quote:

"A free people ought not only to be armed and disciplined, but they should have sufficient arms and ammunition to maintain a status of independence from any who might attempt to abuse them, which include their own government. ~George Washington"

A few weeks ago, this quote with varying images of George Washington was repeatedly posted/shared on Facebook. It didn't bode well with me. So, I copied it and went in search of the truth.

Here's what I found:

According to Wikipedia, Washington actually said this at the First Annual Address to both Houses of Congress in January of 1790.

"A free people ought not only to be armed, but disciplined; to which end a uniform and well-digested plan is requisite; and their safety and interest require that they should promote such manufactories as tend to render them independent of others for essential, particularly military, supplies. ~ George Washington"

The highly circulated {mis}quote is categorized as a "spurious attribution" on Wikipedia. That is to say that it's not only misattributed to Washington, but no one else said it either. In fact, it's the product of someone {clearly a gun-rights enthusiast, in this case} taking part of a real quote and fabricating the rest to support his or her particular interest.

Snake Oil

This week I saw one on WD-40 that caught my eye. It was interesting; explaining how WD-40 got its name and how it was created and all the ways you could use it. The very end revealed the main ingredient in this lubricant was surprisingly fish oil.

Well, I thought this smelled a little "fishy" {Forgive me; it was too easy} so I looked it up.

According to Snopes.com this bit has been circulating since 2006. Snopes reports that they asked the makers of WD-40 about the extensive list of uses. The manufacturer removed a number of the purported 45 uses outlined in the bogus email/post.

And as for the fish oil, it's a rumor. While there is no ingredient list on the can, there is an MSDA sheet which indicates that WD-40 is petroleum based.

The Scoop

So, next time you spy something on Facebook being shared by your friends, check it out first. You might be spreading gossip. Or worse you could be libeling someone or infringing on someone's copyright.

The moral of the story:

Before you share, think to yourself,

1. Does this smell like rat?
2. Does it look like a rat?

If the answers to these questions are "Yes" or "My opinion is too jaded to know" then do a quick search and see if it is truly a rat. The "interwebs" won't lead you astray {well, if you use good judgment}, even when your friends do. Over and out...

*It would stand to reason that the photo above would be George Washington since I discussed him above, right? But, did anyone notice that I was leading you astray? It's not George, it's John Adams. I happended to have a book on him, but couldn't find a photo of Washington in my home. I figured that it could prove my point about leading astray.

Anna

Random Tidbits: On a Rampage {Strong Opinions}

New Rules

I've been juggling a lot with work lately, which means that everything else suffers. So, I've decided to make some rules for myself, and I'm really trying to stick with it.

I'm setting weekly office hours. We're holding weekly family meetings with an agenda, a white board and an Angry Bird (that's a whole other post...stay tuned). I'm standing firm on what I can and cannot add to my overly stuffed schedule...and refusing to feel guilty about saying "No" when I need to.

Unfortunately, one of the things that has taken a backseat to being a priority lately has been writing. So, I'm trying this Random Bits style again...cuz you know I have things to say, but just not much time to get them said!

Bits and Pieces

1. Y'all know how I feel about using your phone and driving, right?! If you don't then read this: I Hit A Child with My Car and all the other Distracted Driving posts I've written. Well, my friend, Trina, a dedicated Phone Down, Eyes Up driver sent me this photo that her friend sent to her. I love it! And there's a lot of truth in this statement...believe it.
   
2. In DC, a Councilmember has introduced a bill to curb cheating. If passed, it would make facilitating cheating on standardized tests illegal. Now I'm certainly against cheating, but what troubles me is that there has to be such laws in place to prevent school personnel from tampering with tests.

   Shouldn't this be a given to teachers and administrators? Perhaps, the better answer is to take a look at why there is such a need to "fix" standardized tests in this district and examine the education resources and funding.

3. Apparently there is overcrowding at the Metro Louisville jail in Kentucky. The solution? Well, USA Today reports that "tech-savvy professionals will use technology and data to study the overcrowding," of course. The pros will be trying to find some possible solutions.

   News Flash! I've got a solution. Use that money to study how to get kids off the streets, keep them safe, educate them, and get them out of the cycle of committing crimes-jail-committing crimes-jail that many of their older siblings, parents, aunts and uncles and friends are in instead of employing "tech-savvy professionals." This is not an engineering/spatial problem; this is societal issue, a human interest story that could have happy ending.

4. Lastly, the total cost of the 2012 elections, from federal to state to local offices, was...hold on to your boots, friends... $7.3 BILLION (according to Politico.com)! WHAT A WASTE! Don't get me started on what that could have been spent on. This amount of money could have made a huge impact on many of the very causes and issues and institutions and families addressed by the candidates running for office. So many could have been greatly benefitted by even a fraction of this money being spent in a positive way. Here are more of my thoughts on the subject of political campaign spending.

The Scoop

Hmmm, it turns out I'm full of opinions this Monday morning. Well, there you have it. Over and out...

Anna

5 Things You Should Know {Leavin’ on a Jet Plane; Simple Airplane Etiquette}

I'm fresh off an airplane, and I've made some observations....not surprising, I know. The thing is people are interesting, and I'm always watching, listening and soaking it all in and of course, making recommendations....

1. Rear Loading: For the love of Pete, why oh why are planes not loaded back to front; Diamond Executive Platinum, Triple Gold Crown, Head Honchos and Hallowed Ones could walk on at their leisure right before the plane took off and not ever to have lay eyes on the rest of the herd at the rear of the plane; the common folk. And we, the common folk, could easily find our way to our seats row by row, from the last row to the front row. Makes sense, no?
2. Polite Hygiene Practices: Dear Sirs, if you can't aim for the toilet and make it within the ring, do us ALL a favor and sit down! And if you make a mess, PLEASE clean it up. This is not an inner city subway bathroom or a field or forest miles from all civilization; be courteous to those who must use the facilities after you;
3. Heavyweight Workout: For those who find it hard to leave home without everything, as I do, there ought to be luggage with a scale built into the bag. This would really simplify things and ease my nerves about my overstuffed bag as I check-in.

   Let me just add, I am very suspicious of people who can check one small suitcase and skip onto the plane with a teeny tote bag. Seriously, have you no business to conduct on your computer or tablet, no need for makeup to touch up with, no extra undies, in case your bag is lost (hey, it happens), no books to read or celeb mags to catch up on, no sweater in case of a chill? Do you pack only one outfit and one pair of shoes? How do you do it?

4. Stuff It and Slam It. If your rolling carry on stuffed to the gills won't fit in the overhead compartment, stuffing and pushing and huffing and puffing and slamming and ramming will not get yours to miraculously fit. And if you are one of the last to board, you will most certainly be out of luck; so plan for it and don't act exasperated and shocked when all space has already been claimed. And no, it's not OK to smash aforementioned fellow passenger's teeny tote just to make room for your super-sized "carry-on" that should have been checked to begin with.
5. Positive Reinforcement: On my ride back home to Minneapolis, as we boarded our jet, the passengers were met with soft, uplifting music wafting through the fuselage and photos of beautiful landscapes playing on the video screens throughout the plane. I have to say, I have never seen such courteous, kind, helpful passengers, smiling, joking, exchanging pleasantries, moving out of the way, hefting a heavy bag for a stranger, re-arranging their own bags to make room for others' bags.

   It was a full flight and there were no cross faces or frustrated exchanges or sarcastic comments observed by me, and be assured I was watching. I sat in the middle of the plane, on an exit row, smack in the middle. This is a seat I hate to have; I'm an aisle hog. But I felt happy and settled with that music playing and the images slowly going by one after the other. I don't know what their intention was, but it worked to curb anger and keep everyone feeling cordial towards each other.

I have a few more notes, such as, house slippers are not considered shoes, not even at an airport and do listen to the attendants when they tell you to power down your devices; they mean it and no one, not even the triple platinum gold crown head honchos, are above this list of airplane rules of etiquette. Over and out...

Anna

 

 

My Grandma: A Lesson in Genes

My grandma; it's complicated. If I weren't so much like her, I might not understand her as much as I do. Genetics are funny, aren't they?

I have written about many of my family members over the last several years, and while I have mentioned my grandma in a few posts, I haven't written much about her; and I'll tell you why.

Writing about my grandma is like writing about me and my deepest, darkest self; and that's hard. We're both often misunderstood; we can be very giving, loving and kind, but we can also be mean, bitter and hurtful. Much of the time our intentions are well-intended, but not always.

My grandma and I have always been close in ways; there were times that she hurt my feelings over the years, and I'm sure there have been times that I hurt her feelings, but we always forgive, but not forget, and move on.

During my college years, I was only a two hour drive away from her, and I made that drive fairly often. It was at this time that I had some of my best visits with her. That's also when our relationship changed; I was no longer a little girl. My grandma didn't feel that she had to instruct me and guide me; she became more relaxed and shared more and laughed more.

I get my writing prowess from her {and her son, my dad}, as well as my love of words and books; my eye for creating beautiful spaces; my expensive taste; my love of animals; my need to control things; and my ability to cut to the bone with just a few lightning quick, sharp-as-daggers words.

Often, it seems, that the traits that you hope stay put get passed along generation after generation; just a bit more diluted with each generation. Perhaps it's our gifts and faults that haven't been fully realized that keep re-surfacing, a kind of reincarnation of our selves. None of us are perfect, and there is no better lesson than to see another's fault and know that it's also your fault.

I'm proud of my grandma. She won't be intimidated; she speaks her mind; she gives; she lives her life each day; she's funny and witty; she still strives to learn and do and be. See the resemblance? Over and out....

Anna

Motherly Advice {Living Fearlessly}

There is nothing to fear but fear itself.

    ~ Franklin D. Roosevelt

I held his arm as he took wobbly, but determined steps. I wondered if this was the right decision. But when I looked into his face, I knew it was.

These weren't his first steps ever, but they were his first steps wearing ice skates. About a month ago, Darling 2, my four year-old son, decided he wanted to play hockey. I offered up every other sport I could think of, but to no avail. {Hockey is rough and expensive and time-consuming, and really not what I'd like him to pursue.} Darling 2 was sure.

So, I registered him for pre-beginner skate lessons. And here we were; him standing in the middle of the rink with a handful of other pre-beginners and me standing behind the glass, praying for the best.

He stood there beaming with determination, enthusiasm and pride. And then he slipped and fell. I braced with a thumbs up and an encouraging smile as he attempted to stand again. He slipped and spun and slipped again, but then he got it and stood up. He turned and looked at me. I watched for crumbling confidence, a changed mind, waves of doubt, but what I saw made my heart swell with love and pride.

Darling 2 was resolute. He knew that learning to skate is the first step to playing hockey. He never faltered in his determination or excitement during that lesson as he followed his teachers' instructions and did what was asked of him no matter how many times he tumbled and slid down to the ice. He always got back up on his own with a smile on his face.

Now, that is living without fear. He was not worried about failing; he was not concerned about what he could not yet do; he did let others sway his opinion. He knew this was the first step to his goal.

For many, it is this fear of failure that holds us back; whether it's in our careers or personal goals or ideas or dreams or relationships. It is fear that holds our hands and whispers words of doubt and self-pity and blame into our ears.

We may call it being cautious or working out a plan or hedging our bets. We may say that once this or that happens, then we'll do it. We may blame it on finances, time or circumstances. But really those are just the seeds that fear has planted; seeds that will never take root or sprout or grow; never to be harvested. Fear knows the power it holds.

Living past fear is going for it regardless of anything else; keeping the goal in sight even when fear tries to block your vision; getting back up every time fear trips you; keeping an open mind even when fear works to distract you with petty snags; and keeping a smile on your face even when fear taunts you.

How many of us can say we live this way? Not many. But what if we all lived this way?

Now, if Darling 2 had come off that ice and told me he was wrong it was not his dream to play hockey and skating was not his thing, I'd still love him and be proud of him for trying. And he may still make this decision after learning to skate and learning the game of hockey, but at least he will have gone out there and given it a shot.

And really it's just as important to realize when something is not right; when something is no longer your goal or that your intended path has veered from this present course. But you won't have been pushed around by fear; you will be plotting your own way. Over and out...

Anna

Random Tidbits: Food Edition {or Chocolate, Pizza and Guacamole}

Getting Busy in the Kitchen Again

I'm back in the saddle again...er, uh, that is, back in the kitchen again. For the past three years, I was a part of a meal swap group, which meant I didn't have to think much about what we ate for dinner. During this time, I got lazy in my meal preparations and ideas, but due to a necessary dietary change recently, I'm getting busy in the kitchen again. And it feels Great!

Now, don't get me wrong, the meal swap group was a good thing for me and my family during those three years. I enjoyed the community of the group; the getting to know the women; the convenience of having many wonderful meals in our freezer, homemade meals, prepared by moms. It was a lovely group and wonderful experience. But I do LOVE to cook and create in the kitchen, and so it's refreshing and inspiring for me.

Cooking with the Senses

Cooking is really a delight for the 5 senses. Food must not only taste good {if not amazing}, it must have a pleasant appearance, an enticing aroma, an appealing texture and create a warm and inviting bubbling, sizzling, chuckling, crackling sound while cooking. If a meal is not all of these things, it's almost not worth eating.

Well, that's what I have been busy with lately (besides everything else that I've been busy with); changing our diet by taking out all gluten, and cooking away, tweaking recipes, creating new ones and searching for tried and true recipes, and all the while serving up scrumptious meals.

There are several benefits. We have been trying to new foods, rediscovering old favorites and simply eating more fresh veggies again. My kids have been eating what I prepare much better than they had been in the last year or so while participating in meal swap. And we've been heavily contributing to Darling 1's 1^st Grade class's compost project with all of our peels and skins and tips and tail ends. Our meals have been fresh and vibrant and bursting with flavor and nutrition.

A Sample Plate of Favorite Tastes of the Moment

Last week, I posted a Random Tidbits article of points of interest. This week, the Random Tidbits post is links to recipes that I've made in the last few weeks or particular products and foods that we can't get enough of at our home.

And for the love of God, if nothing else, please try to the Primal Fudge. As my friend who texted me the link said to me, "You're Welcome!"

1. Primal Fudge (from Practical Paleo): This decadent fudge (click link for recipe) is gluten free, dairy free and paleo friendly for those with special dietary needs, and still amazingly rich and easy and chocolatey for those who don't have dietary restrictions.
   1. A couple of things: I used peanut butter because that's what I had on hand and it was perfection; and it wasn't any special kind of peanut butter either.
   2. Now, with the coconut oil in it, they really aren't stable at room temperature or warmer. So, what I suggest is eat that you eat them as quickly as possible; this won't be difficult (or of course, if you want to be practical and disciplined you could just store them in the fridge)
   3. Oh, and I doubled the recipe (when I noticed it made only 10 large discs) and I used some standard size and some mini size muffin cups, as you can see from the photo.
2. Polenta Crust Mini Pizzas (from The Perfect Pantry): I was looking for this recipe and made them for Will's birthday dinner.
   1. They were tasty, easy and pretty and the boys loved them too. I didn't use the toppings suggested, but what I had on hand.
   2. I had spinach sautéed in garlic, sautéed mushrooms, onions and sweet peppers, mozzarella, parmesan and a goat's milk, sheep's milk and cow's milk blend I had in the fridge. This cheese from pungent and smooth and perfect with the veggies.
   3. I made a variety of flavors from just cheese to everything to spinach and cheese to peppers, onions and cheese and on and on.
   4. I think I would cook the crusts for a few minutes first then load them up and put them back in the oven next time I make these guys. This will help to firm up the bottom of the crusts.
3. Gluten Free Pizza Crust: We were ecstatic to find that Dominoes Pizza and Davanni's, Pizza Luce and Pizzeria Lola have gluten free crusts.
   1. Last Friday, we even had pizzas delivered from both Dominoes and Davanni's and did a taste test.
   2. The Result: both are really good. It's a thin crust and a bit chewier the regular crust, but good.
   3. Caveat: Gluten Free Crust is available in only the Small size. And it's not cheap. So, to feed a family of four, you have to order 3 to 4 and spend a small fortune for a pizza dinner.
4. Chocolate Mousse (from Celiac Chicks): Another easy peasy gluten free, but again fabulously decadent chocolate dessert recipe!
   1. Make it in small dishes; it's rich. But not too rich that I couldn't eat two small bowls, tiny really, back to back.
   2. Coincidentally, both of these dessert recipes use the blender and set up in the fridge/freezer and are marvelous.
5. Guacamole and Falafel chips (from Trader Joe's or TJ's as homeys who shop there every week, sometime more frequently, like to say): This is good stuff!
   1. We have been eating a lot of guacamole lately; on tacos, salads, with crackers, with these amazing falafel chips, on sandwiches, etc. Guacamole/avocados are so versatile and nutritious. How do you like to eat them?
   2. The guacamole is fresh and chunky and yummy. The boys love it and often take it for lunch or for snack;
   3. The chips are snappy with flavor and chock full of veggies and spices, with the same ingredients of falafel with a bean base – and no gluten - I know, it's a shocker. Darling 1 loves these. They make excellent black bean nachos too.

What inspires you to cook and create in the kitchen? What's your favorite ingredient of the season? Over and out....

Anna